I haven’t talked about my emotions for awhile, so I’ll try to be brief.
I’ve been feeling trapped.
Trapped by technology: I’m embarrassed to bring my laptop to class because it’s kind of noisy, I’m nervous about getting an IPad because I’m scared I might break it, and they’re expensive, I’m scared I’m addicted to my IPhone, but then again, so are most Americans.
Trapped by my own self-doubt: In terms of schoolwork, I feel like everything I write isn’t nearly as good as the others, I was too chicken to enter last week’s dance competition, and then there’s the usual bad feelings.
Trapped in my apartment: Other than class, rehearsal, meetings – I don’t have much in the way of reasoning to leave my apartment, especially now as it gets colder outside. I feel like an animal in its cage, just hanging around and not doing much. I’m basically one of the animals in the zoo that everyone walks past.
I need to find something to help me feel free…or, freer.
Oh, and I haven’t heard from Awkward Miss Estonia, or any Estonians for that matter. But it’s only a day, so I guess I need to be more patient.