This afternoon, I did something I didn’t think I’d do again.
Yep. Got on a paddle board.
I thought it might be easier the second time, and in a way, it was. The water was very calm, as I suppose it would be, being a lake rather than a harbor. I got there at around 2:30, and headed out at around 2:50. Being on the water was nice; it wasn’t an especially hot day, and thankfully it wasn’t too windy. Paddling out from the shore was easier than I thought. But then, once I got far away from land, I got a little more nervous. My knees locked and buckled, and I focused so much on keeping my eyes straight ahead and paddling and keeping myself upright and making sure that the sweat wasn’t getting into my eyeballs that I probably looked more silly than cool. I was planning on making it to at least the far dock, the one closest to Camp Randall. When I got to about the halfway point, a gentle breeze came and turned me exactly 180 degrees, so I guess it was Mother Nature telling me to go back to the dock. Feeling a bit defeated, I managed to get back without having fallen at all, for the entire…thirty minutes I was out there.
Anyway, tomorrow I’m back on the grind. Right now, I’m almost done watching a video for tomorrow, and I’ve still got stuff to read.
This week is going to be so weird, I can already feel it.
Hopefully there will be more normalcy in my future…well, in my real life, so I can get back to silliness here.
Today, I realized that there are certain things that I was afraid of when I was younger, that don’t scare me that much anymore, and then some things that used to not bother me, that really get to me now.
Here’s a few of them.
What I’m No Longer Scared Of
- Showering/changing in public. Yes, I do avoid it when possible, but it’s not such a terrible thing. Growing up, I would always change for gym class in a bathroom stall (as did a few others). I guess I just realized that no one was looking at me. Now, I just sing in the shower at the gym because I can, and who really gives a darn?
- The dentist. It’s a necessary evil, and dentists can be weird, but it’s temporary and if you’re lucky, you’re good for a year or so.
- Going to bed late. I don’t know why this used to scare me, but I’d get really uncomfortable if I was awake too late.
- Toilets that flush automatically. Got used to them.
What Scares Me Now
Heights. I was never really a huge fan, but I never had a problem with them. I have noticed lately that I get a little vertigo in high places
- Riding a bike. Well, that scared me as a kid as well, but when Dan and I went biking on Martha’s Vineyard, I was about to have a heart attack.
- Being yelled at in public. I used to be able to brush it off, but now it just makes me want to yell back, and make you uncomfortable.
- Teaching my own classes next week. It’s kind of a mix of nervousness and excitement. I just hope I do well.
My 2015 summer travel odyssey has really snuck up on me. I’ve been telling everyone about it for so long but in ten hours, it’s actually happening. By this time tomorrow, I will hopefully be at Julie’s place in Salt Lake City.
Since I have to catch a flight at 9 tomorrow morning, I should probably be packing. However, I am in a pool hall waiting for my nachos to arrive.
Please don’t let me forget anything essential.
Today I didn’t feel like doing too much, and I still don’t, but I should at least make a list of things I should be doing right now, or something.
What I Should Be Doing
- Making treats for meeting tomorrow.
- Making something nutritious for dinner. Maybe eggs or something.
- Writing either of my two papers for next week.
- Sending some emails I probably should have sent last week.
- Clean apartment.
What I Want to Do Right Now
- Read for pleasure.
- Watch another episode of Submissions Only.
- Watch the last hour of Shall We Dance?
And let it be known that for the first day in May, I got visitors from all 6 continents! North America (Canada, USA), South America (Peru), Europe (UK, Spain, France), Asia (India, Qatar, Hong Kong, Taiwan), Africa (Uganda) and Oceania (Australia)!
My night was just ruined thanks to two separate complete sociopaths who did the same thing to me.
1. Waiting in line, grabbed me by the waist to get around me.
2. Drunkenly walked up to where I was seated and put her drunk head on my back.
Never again am I going to out for a late night slice of pizza again. At the very least, carry out.
My back is still tingling. I don’t know if I’ll be able to sleep tonight.
Last night, the fire alarm went off, and since it was two in the morning and there was no way I was going out in the SNOW (yes, it’s snowing here), I took that as time to wash the giant pile of dishes that has been piling up in the sink. I don’t know what I was thinking, but I had two wine glasses sitting behind the sink, and as I took a clean bowl out of the dishwasher, I knocked one into the sink.
Now I only have nine wine glasses. Wine glasses that came from my grandmother, that survived the moves from Baltimore to Houston to Madison to Madison again, plus countless people (okay, maybe like fifty) who have used them since they have been in my possession.
And just like that, one tipped over and broke, right into the sink, where it was easy to fish out the pieces with a cloth and throw them into the garbage like last week’s beer bottle.
It’s just a glass, and it’s not even that special; my grandmother probably got them at a department store or something. I could probably even find the same pattern online if I tried hard enough. It was just the shattering of the glass that made my heart judder, just a little bit. I’ve been a bit edgy lately, nervous, anxious, ready to go home but not ready for all the work I have to do before then, worried about friends and family, feeling somewhat lonely, and lazy because I’ve only danced twice this week and haven’t been to the gym at all. I’m just living my life.
Oh well, at least I got to do my Florida Evans impression to myself in my apartment.
Just a quick update.
The apartment is fully packed (well, 90%) in boxes and bags. Some will go into my car; most of it, though, into storage.
I have about half of my paper down, which I will finish tonight come hell or high water so I can print a copy, then pack up the printer.
I still need to eat the dinner I just cooked, put laundry in the dryer, and take books to the library.
Tonight will be my final night in 620 N. Carroll St., Apartment 409, ever.
Tomorrow morning I will return my Internet box (too stressed to think of what it’s called), get some money from the ATM, retrieve my water bottle from the gym and possibly take a shower if I feel so inclined, pick up some contact solution at Walgreens, shove some stuff in the mail, and get the 1:00 PM bus to Chicago (already paid for!), or, if I play my cards right, the 11:30 AM bus.
I will have no fixed address for the next month.
Adios, Mendota…hola, being a hobo.