1

Stop. Shop?

There is something that is easily the most annoying thing about this time of year. It’s not the ever-present Christmas music despite the fact that it’s not even December, and it’s not everyone posting pictures of their nearly-identical dinners on Facebook. And it’s not even the terrible American consumer clusterfuck that is Black Friday.

It’s the BLACK FRIDAY EMAILS.

Out of the hundred emails I got this weekend, I think around 95 were coupons, offers, or deals, from basically every place that has my credit card information. Amazon, Hulu, World Market, Best Buy, Kohl’s…even sites I don’t think I’ve used in years, if ever, such as my alma mater’s school store and some cruise line. At the end of the day, what do all of these emails, these complete wastes of digital design and disk space, say about our culture? It only reinforces these thoughts that we need more, more, more.

In my last post, I wrote about having stuff, and not wanting people to touch said stuff, get rid of said stuff, or coerce me into getting rid of said stuff. This isn’t undercutting that argument, but expanding it. Stop asking me to get more stuff. 

I mean, sure, I don’t have every single thing that I could ever want in the world. Few do. But I have one mattress; I don’t need two. I have one toaster; I don’t need two. Maybe it’s just me, but if I really need/want something, I try to procure it as soon as I can, rather than waiting for a specific time of year when I might be able to save ten dollars on it. Who needs to raid Target and Best Buy and Kohl’s? Who needs carts full of big-screen TVs, video-game systems, Kitchen-Aid mixers? Why are you constantly harping on me to buy things that I don’t want or need? I have the things I need, and I feel like most others probably do as well. Unsubscribe, unsubscribe, unsubscribe.

Well, I guess since the Pilgrims massacred the Indians, it’s the 21st century Americans’ turn to massacre what little dignity we have left.

‘Tis the season.

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4

Too Much Tuesday

First, there was Black Friday.

Then, there was African-American Friday.

Then, there was Cyber Monday.

This year took it to a whole new level: Giving Tuesday.

What is this?

First of all, stop it with the naming of the days. They already have arbitrary names that I sometimes don’t remember as it is. Second of all, the only thing that’s being given is a headache, to me and the rest of the world. Soliciting for a donation is normally not a problem, but when I wake up to 47 emails asking for money from everything from American Cancer Society to Maryland Book Bank, it makes me want to not donate. Which is the opposite of the point of the day, I think. Also, you’re giving Internet servers worldwide even more spam. Finally, oddly enough, I’m still getting emails, over a week later.

Giving Tuesday? Give me a break.

Now that I’ve gotten that out of my system, happy Tuesday, everyone. My day consisted of a presentation, followed by too much running around, baking sufganiyot, and rehearsing in the dance studio. Can it be the weekend already? I am exhausted.

So yeah, seriously. Give me a break.