6

Quinoa-Wa-Wa-Tusi

And let it be known that as of yesterday, That’s So Jacob has hopped on the quinoa train.

Yes, it’s another new recipe. It required a bit more effort than normal, and had mixed results, but it made an awful lot of food, more than I thought it would, for which I am grateful. This recipe comes from Emily at A Nutritionist Eats (not, as I thought it was originally, A Nutrition Is Teats).

That’s So Jacob Presents:

That’s So Nom: Treats and Eats from Jacob’s Completely Amateur Kitchen

Episode 5: Quinoa Black Bean Salad

Step 1: Look at recipes online.

Step 2: Gather ingredients.

Step 3: How does one properly wash quinoa? Isn’t it going to get boiled anyway?

Step 4: Put 1 cup of quinoa into a pot of water. Note that it doesn’t look like an awful lot of quinoa, so throw in a little more. Bring to a boil.

Step 5: While that’s happening, combine your olive oil, honey, lime, and shallots, and whisk.

Step 6: Take the lid off the quinoa, and realize HOLY HELL THAT’S A LOT OF QUINOA. Drain quinoa and dump into whatever bowls you can find

Step 7: Toss the honey-lime vinaigrette with the quinoa and try not to get too much of your quinoa stuck to your hands.

Step 7: Drain black beans, put on quinoa. Mix. Enjoy some quinoa!

Step 8: Wonder why you bought green onions and cotija.

Step 9: Go to the Internet, and sigh in relief that they are the final two ingredients, so chop those onions and put them in, as well as the cotija that you clearly bought way too much of.

Step 10: Enjoy the spare quinoa, put the rest in tupperware containers.

The recipe says to chill overnight, but I ate some while it was still warm and it was flavorful and delicious. I only had a few forkfuls, then chilled the rest. I just had some right now, and it’s not terrible but I think it tasted a little better warm. Oh well, at least I have enough quinoa black bean salad for the rest of eternity. Off to find some new recipes, maybe for chicken or fish this time.

2

LBBBB

One of my summer resolutions was to try out some new recipes, hopefully healthy ones, and so last night I tried my hand at this LBBBB, AKA a Chipotle-style black bean burrito bowl, thanks to Anjali of The Picky Eater Blog.

That’s So Jacob Presents:

That’s So Nom: Treats and Eats from Jacob’s Completely Amateur Kitchen

Episode 4: Little Black Bean Burrito Bowl

Step 1: Look at recipes online.

Step 2: Salivate at the pretty pictures, then get your ass up and out to the store to buy ingredients. Except…cottage cheese, no thank you (don’t hate me, I just never liked it!)

Step 3: Come home and procrastinate until dinnertime.

Step 4: Chop 1 onion, 1 yellow pepper, and 1/2 jalapeno pepper, and saute in canola oil. Sprinkle garlic powder on top because I don’t have a garlic press and garlic powder works just fine.

Step 5: Sprinkle on a dash of cumin and a dash of chili powder, then dump the black beans on top. Boil for 10-15 minutes, realizing that if you put the salmon in the oven for 20 minutes at the same time, you can just turn the stove off when the timer hits 5:00. SMART!

Step 6: Heat some rice and corn in the microwave.

Step 7: Take bowl. Put in rice, then mixture, then corn. Sprinkle on cilantro and salsa

Step 8: Enjoy your protein filled deliciousness, and get halfway through before realizing that you bought diced tomatoes but didn’t use them, but it tastes good anyway.

Makes 2-3 dinner-sized portions. Refrigerates very nicely.

I’m currently eating my second portion for dinner, and am happy to say that it’s just as delicious as the first. So, consider this a success! Thanks, food blog!

And hooray for six continent day! Welcome to North America (Canada and USA), South America (Guyana), Europe (UK, Netherlands, and France), Asia (India, Philippines, and Qatar), Africa (Sudan), and Oceania (Fiji). Come back soon, I’m nice!

4

Tiny Edible Penguins for Humans Big and Small

This semester, I’m on the education team for our Theatre for Young Audiences (TYA) production, which happens to be about penguins. As e-team members, we will not be performing in the shows but making programs (paper and online), educational materials for classrooms, lobby displays, school assemblies, and other things that I am probably forgetting to mention here. At Wednesday’s rehearsal, the creative food artist in me had an epiphany: there must be some recipe that we can include in the material for the children to do. I had this image of tiny penguins made from olives and cream cheese. Because I always look for any excuse to do work/not do work, I decided to stay up until 2 in the morning making culinary masterpieces for class today, and I call them Baby Penguin Canapes. I have not written the childrens’ version yet, but here’s the adult version of what will surely become a culinary classic.

That’s So Jacob Presents:

That’s So Nom: Treats and Eats from Jacob’s Completely Amateur Kitchen

Episode 3: Baby Penguin Canapes

Step 1: Look at recipes online and then realize that you can probably figure it out yourself.

Step 2: Grab a fellow blogger and head to Target to buy ingredients. I chose Princess Ciarawho happens to be in my dance class. Together, go to Target, buy carrots, olives, and cream cheese. Intersperse with bits of gossip.

Step 3: Come home and realize you probably should have bought regular carrots but these baby carrots will have to do.

Step 4: Chop carrots into little circles.

Step 5: Very carefully, cut a tiny wedge from the carrot circle. Put that aside for now; that will become the beak. The Pac-Man shaped piece will be the feet.

Step 6: Make a ball of cream cheese about the size of a large olive. Put it on the carrot feet.

Step 7: Wash an olive, then cut it long ways.

Step 8: Slap the sides of the olive on the cream cheese ball, gingerly. As in, with ginger. Seriously, that’s a weird phrase. Who came up with that? The olives will be the wings.

Step 9: Wash a second olive and make a small slit in it short ways.

Step 10: Remember that tiny piece of carrot that may or may not have fallen on the floor or in the sink? Wedge it into the second olive and make it look like a beak.

Step 11: Put the second olive on top of the cream cheese ball, and hold for a few seconds until it stays.

Step 12: You’ve made a penguin. Celebrate!

Step 13: Realize that you need to transfer the penguin to a Tupperware. Put in refrigerator and hope that people appreciate it when you bring it to them the next day. (Spoiler alert: they went surprisingly well!)

Makes about 8 penguins, or until you feel you’ve lost control of your sanity.

Helpful Advice: Keep the olives washed and dried because you will get cream cheese everywhere. Keep the counter clean and dry or else the penguins will slide dangerously close to the edge. Stabilize with a toothpick, or if you’re feeling fancy, a cocktail umbrella.

And…double yay for another six-continent day! No new countries, but warm welcomes to North America (Canada, USA, Antigua and Barbuda, and Mexico), South America (Chile), Europe (UK, Germany, France, Spain, Czech Republic, and Norway), Africa (Mayotte), Asia (UAE, Singapore, India, and Philippines) and Oceania (Australia and Guam).