Wonderful, Wonderful Wisconsin: Czech Slovak Fest

Finally, almost a week after returning, I have a moment to compress and express my thoughts on the Czech Slovak Fest in an episode of…

That’s So Jacob Presents: Wonderful, Wonderful Wisconsin

Episode 4: Czech-Slovak Fest


Official proof I was there.

Official proof I was there.

One day this past semester, I mentioned to an APO friend, Liz, that I was part Slovak. I don’t know how the topic came up – I think we were talking about languages – and she mentioned Phillips and the Czech Slovak Fest happening in June.

My first thought: “Awesome! I wanna go!”

My second thought: “Wait. Where’s Phillips?”

I asked my mom’s friend, who lives in the central part of the state, about two hours away, where Phillips was, and she said that it was “a small town, somewhere north of us, I think.” I looked it up on the map, and little did I know, but it is four hours north of Madison. That’s a lot of driving for one day. My parents said that I could spent the night there if I got tired, but after looking up info on the town – population 343 – it didn’t seem like the most fun place to spend the night. Plus, through the three days of the festival, the only interesting things were happening on Saturday, so I set out relatively early in the morning to make the trek up to northern Wisconsin.

Usually I can shave some time off of my drive, but even I was worried when my GPS said I’d be in for four hours of driving, each way. There are two ways to get up there: taking the superhighway through Stevens Point/Wausau, or taking a more scenic route through the Dells and a few rural counties – Clark and Taylor – that I hadn’t been to. To my benefit, I loaded a few geocaches for each of those counties, plus Price (where Phillips is) in case I hit a dead zone.

I left a little later than I wanted and thought that I could make it at least halfway without stopping…but not so much. My eyes started drooping around Dells, so I pulled off for a Starbucks. This is the first time I’ve seen the Dells in the summer, and it was surprisingly crowded. Once armed with coffee, I hit the road again as the scenery got more and more rural. Surprisingly, outside of a small area near Necedah, I had great cell phone reception, even while stopped for a train in some little town I can’t remember. I don’t think I ever saw a sign for Clark County, but pretty soon I was in Taylor County, passing through the adorable town of Colby. In Medford, I made my first stop, to grab a nearby geocache so I could check Taylor County off my list; for some reason, I missed Clark. Oh well. When I saw the Price County sign, I knew I was getting close, and after four full hours, I arrived at Phillips High School and the festival.

My $2 entry fee got me a nifty button and a festival guide. They were selling Czech and Slovak treats in the cafeteria, but it was mostly pork and thereby uninteresting to me. I did, however, enjoy the display posters of Slovaks and Czechs in Wisconsin; I’m a sucker for posters.

As I was about to enter the gym, which held the craft fair, I saw my friend Liz, dressed in a traditional kroj, along with her mom. I got a cute picture with her, but unfortunately, I had missed her pageant performance. Those events had happened in the morning. Whoops. At least I got to enjoy the craft fair in the gym.

There were a surprising number of actual Czech and Slovak souvenirs in the craft fair. I was hoping to practice my Slovak, and I managed to overhear two ladies speaking it at one of the booths, so I greeted them in Slovak to their surprise. We had a short conversation in Slovak before switching over to English. I told them my story and they told me theirs. Before I left to see the other exhibits, one of the ladies pressed something into my hand, “here, take it. For being such a good Slovak speaker.”

I looked down, and it was Horalky, a delicious chocolate wafer cookie treat. YUM.

After that, I poked around some more, and went into the auditorium to watch some performers. It wasn’t too impressive, but the girl in the kroj playing the tuba wasn’t too bad; I’m just not too into tuba, so I left, to find the library. In the library, they had all these computers with Ancestry.com databases loaded up on them, and though it took awhile, I managed to find some really interesting stuff, including several census records with my family, and the names of my great-great-grandparents, Israel and Annie. I got ahold of my mom and dad later, who told me that they didn’t know his name, but they thought that her name was Bluma. However, people had English and Hebrew names at that time, so it’s very possible that Annie was her English name. I also found my great-grandfather’s army draft card. According to the physical description on the card, we looked a lot alike!

The school-part of the festival ended, so I gassed up the car, got a Subway sandwich (for a town of 343, the fact that they had a Subway is pretty impressive) and found a geocache, before heading to the VFW Post for some beer tasting and chatting with other townsfolk. I had a really nice conversation in Slovak and English with Ivan and Linda, a couple visiting from Neenah, about our trips to Slovakia, the things we saw, and the foods we ate. There was a polka band playing, and some older couples were dancing. It was cute. However, it was getting late, and I wanted to hit the road before dark, so I left after 7 hours of fun.

Coming back, I decided to take the highway route to see something different. I’m glad I did; even the highway wasn’t as well lit as I thought it was, and I couldn’t imagine how dark the countryside must have been. I stopped in Stevens Point for some food, and arrived home at about 1:00 in the morning.

In conclusion, though I didn’t have that many expectations for the festival, I think that it was probably worth the trip, just to see something different. I was hoping to speak more Slovak, but the fact that I spoke any was a bonus. It was a good excuse to get out of town for the day, even if my legs were exhausted for two whole days.


Pop Culture Showdown: The War of the Roses

I would be remiss if I didn’t acknowledge the two new flags that have shown up on my flag counter, so vitejte to my first visitors from the Czech Republic and to Switzerland, bienvenue or wilkommen, depending on which part of the country you come from.

I originally started this blog to catalog my thoughts and stories, but I’ve deviated from that somehow with rants and videos and other things. I do have more stories to share, plenty more, and maybe they’ll emerge in the coming days of highway boredom, starting tomorrow when my dad and I begin the drive back to Wisconsin.

But for today, I digress…to present the very first edition of:

That’s So Jacob: Pop Culture Showdown

Episode 1: The War of the Roses.

In recent years, Israel has needed more nurses and carers for the elderly and the handicapped than they can supply, so more and more people from the other end of Asia are recruited to fill those gaps. They come from many countries, but mostly from the Philippines. The growing numbers of Filipino caretakers in Israel has even made the word “Filipino” synonymous with “nurse.” It doesn’t matter if they’re a Thai Filipina, an Indian Filipina, a Vietnamese Filipina…they’re all in the same category. Their growing numbers have created a presence in the country, and among them is 47-year-old Rose Fostanes, who just today won the first season of Israel’s version of the reality competition, The X Factor. Called Israel’s Susan Boyle, she is expected to become a musical success even though she will probably go back to her job as a caregiver, because that’s why she’s in Israel in the first place. For no good reason, I have put her up against actress/comedienne/Presidential candidate Roseanne, the original “domestic goddess.” Let’s see how it goes.


Rose: 47 as of last week.

Roseanne: 61. Man does she look rough.


Rose: Christian

Roseanne: Mormon/Jewish/Kabbalah/Twitter


Rose: Openly lesbian, and in a relationship.

Roseanne: Straight, but probably had a lesbian phase. Currently dating after three failed marriages.

Relationship to LGBT?

Rose: See above.

Roseanne: Very liberal. Has several gay siblings and included a multitude of gay characters on Roseanne, including primetime TV’s first gay kiss, and probably the first lesbian kiss as well. Roseanne felt that her show should strive to represent a microcosm of America, and that microcosm included gay people, which no other show did at the time.

Relationship to Israel:

Rose: Um, duh, she just won a reality competition there.

Roseanne: Aspiring to be the next Prime Minister of Israel.

Island of Choice:

Rose: Luzon, the Philippines, where she was born.

Roseanne: The Big Island of Hawaii, where she is in runs a nut farm.

Years of Television Experience:

Rose: Since the 26th of October, 2013.

Roseanne: 26 years (Roseanne premiered on the 18th of October, 1988).

Degrees of Separation:

Rose: 2. Apparently, she’s a friend of a good friend of mine, who sang with her and her band from time to time at Tel Aviv bars.

Roseanne: I have no idea.

Regrettable Round Hairstyle Choice:

Rose: Her audition look. Grown out and better-styled over the course of the series.

Roseanne: Around Season 2, when she got the “Dorothy Hamill” cut.

Vocal Claim to Fame

Rose: Her audition for The X Factor, “This is My Life,” by Shirley Bassey.

Roseanne: Her infamously screechy, profanity-laced, saliva-laden rendition of the National Anthem, which is pretty much all you need to know. But she can sing, and in Hebrew, too:



It was a close one, but congrats, Ms. Fostanes – show ’em how it’s done, tulip.

Let’s get a reaction shot from the runner-up:

Typical Roseanne, always with the shade-throwing. Better luck next time.